1st Corinthians 15:33
Bad company corrupts good character.
Over the past 3 years I have had to surrender a lot of things including long -term friendships, important relationships and just things I thought weren't good for me.
I finally realized I lacked boundaries; I was allowing people to walk around freely in my life and not really realizing that they had access to all the gate codes
Pastor Michael Todd states in his book Relationship Goals “boundaries are the one thing God uses to help us reach our purpose. It preserves who he made us to be at our core.”
I then asked myself Was I protecting my core? How was I protecting my core? And did I really know what that looked like for me.
Then it hit me out of nowhere
Every piece of fruit has a core but how is it protected and why?
The core of a fruit is the central part of it that contains seeds
There are normally three layers to a piece of fruit
1st layer (boundary) -Epicarp
This is the outer layer; it's made to be tough but we have seen many times if you drop it or place it near a rotten piece of fruit it can become bruised or affected by its environment.
2nd Layer (boundary)- Mesocarp
This is the middle layer; this is the part that can be eaten. C
3rd layer (boundary) - Endocarp
This is the last layer; it protects the seed
Why are your seeds so important?
You are a fruit of the spirit and your seeds were meant to be sewn and to produce good fruit!
Galatians 5:22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
Imagine what happens when your core is exposed to the wrong people?
I can, I would call it stunted growth!
I had my core all open and I was allowing myself to not be fulfilled in God’s Purpose for my life. Mostly because I lacked boundaries with all sorts of things.
What is affecting your core?
Dehydrated friendships and thirsty negative behaviors /habits.
Do you lack boundaries?
Sometimes we rely on old fences that were built in the beginning of our relationships (boundaries) and instead of replacing the whole fence, we board it up with old recycled pieces. We then wonder why the same people keep affecting our core and our lives negatively.
How do you put back up good boundaries ?
I had someone say to me... how could you throw away 30+ years of friendship.
I said I didn't throw it away, I built a new fence (boundaries) and it now requires a new access codes to get in. I politely placed things that no longer aligned with my purpose outside my old gate and started to tear down the old one and invested in a new one. I replaced all the old access codes with new ones , this meant that I raised my environmental cost.
“ The biggest enemy you have in your life besides the devil and your mind, is your POTENTIAL ENVIRONMENT”
My Suggestion is that you need to invest in a new fence, this will require people to knock or to ask permission when entering your domain. Once that fence is up it will also require you to update all access codes, this will ensure that even if the same people get in old behaviors and attitudes will not be tolerated.
What does that look like for you ?
This fence shouldn't be cheap either, it should represent the things you want and need to protect in your life. This will cost you and it will not be cheap but it will be worth every bit of emotional currency you have invested in being whole. The cost of peace isn’t cheap, you have to sacrifice your old ways to inherit this lifestyle.
My new fence is state of the art and these access codes are only available to the ones that are invested in protecting my core aka my purpose! Yes, I’m still reading through the manual (my bible) and working out all the kinks that may occur.
· Remember to protect your Core and your mind
That what makes you sick doesn't know it makes you sick!
What type of boundaries do you lack? What type of boundaries are you working on? Comment below !